It's the Thought that counts

I think I am the best driver in Bolton. I am sure I drive with courtesy and consideration for all
road users. I treat the car with respect too. After I'd done a compulsory speed awareness
course, I think I wash even better. I am the one who stops at pedestrian crossings. I try to do one
courteous deed each day. For example I will wave someone through out of a side road. In those
awful places where two slow moving lanes have to merge into one, I go with the flow and if
someone tries to cut in front of me I no longer tailgate to prevent them. I keep my drumming
fingers off the horn if I am caught up in a school run.
But my car doesn't seem to agree. There are two green lights on the dashboard that come on
when the engine is at the wrong speed for the gear I'm in.
I am getting a bit nervous about them. As I go up the hill, it soon flashes, change to a lower gear,
at other times, change to a higher gear. The car wants to be driven differently. I feel it doesn't
approve of my driving. I can't find a way to turn them off or take the bulbs out.
Perhaps I am not a perfect driver after all.
Suppose there were little green lights for other things we do? We assume we always know best,
but do we?.
I am tony MCNEILE a Unitarian.

One of the saddest of Abba songs is, the winner takes it all, It was written as
the group were experiencing their own marital break ups. It must have been
hard to sing with emotions so raw.
Nearly a thousand years ago on this day the English were defeated by the
Normans at the Battle of Senlack Hill. The winner, William of Normandy,
certainly took it all then, carving up the whole country into parcels for his
supporters.
In conflicts the winner rarely does take it all.
The Unitarian William Ellery Channing wrote about war, back in 1839. He
wrote that when a country had an army, it had to be used, you could not leave
it doing nothing.
He also wrote that a defeated country will not stay defeated. It will plot and
scheme for revenge and seek strength to renew the conflict and overturn the
enemy. So War becomes an endless cycle.
Something special is needed to break that cycle. We have witnessed that
when the Second World War ended.
There have been seventy years of peace thanks to the rebuilding of Germany
and not punishing it more.
Conflict can be so cruel when winning becomes everything, whether between
nations or between couples ending a relationship. The winner might seem
to take it all but they lose so much in doing so.
Only when The victor makes gestures to restore friendship can conflict end. It
works at all levels and brings a peace that lasts.
I am Tony McNeile a Unitarian.


It was the queens jubilee when a letter came from the leader of the scout
troop my son would be going into after Cubs. They were very sorry but
unless they had some volunteer leaders the troop would have to fold.
I thought this was very sad at a time when everyone was celebrating and
saying how well the country had done over the last twenty five years.
Everything was booming. So like a good citizen I volunteered to help.
I did the necessary training, went to all the leaders meetings. There seemed
to be a lot of them, and chose a scout name for myself.
Most of the weekly meeting was spent keeping some sort of control on this
highly energised group of young boys. Their games could be physical and
exuberant. They also learnt the chivalry of scouting as well as the
practicalities, like semaphore and morse, tying knots, camp fire cooking and
survival.
We were very proud of our colours. There was competitiveness but also
strong bonds of friendship and pride with other groups.
The older scouts would come with us when we took the cub pack camping.
They enjoyed putting up the tents, guy ropes in lines like soldiers, and then
helping with the games and the camp fire story telling.
There was something honourable in scouting.
I amTony McNeile a Unitarian

When I was a young man living in London on my own I didn't like Christmas. Friends had gone
home, it was an empty place. It was better when we found the one pub that did open on Christmas
Day for the likes of us. We singles happily ignored all the glitz and dined on meat pies from the
bar. But then a card from a friend with an invite, come for climbing in Scotland. I packed my
rucksack and hitch hiked to Durham where we all met. It took all day. He had a van but the
headlights didn't work so we followed other cars for as long as we could until we reached Glencoe
and stayed a week in the ice and snow peaks. The pub didn't open on New Years Eve! Then over
the sea to Skye, camping and climbing for another week. I was was both scary and exhilarating.
The day would end with long abseils off the peaks.
Two weeks of time had dissolved into a long moment of oneness, of being in a wilderness and in
love with life like never before. The hitchhike home took thirty six hours but I didn't care.
There have been some varied Christmases since but every year I remember that winter holiday.
We know now we don't have to travel anywhere to find that state of oneness and bliss. Meditation
or prayer can take us there, but once you have been, your life stays enriched forever.
I am Tony McNeile, a Unitarian

In one weeks time it will be the shortest day, another turning point in the year. Many country
dwellers will celebrate with parties and fire ceremonies. The fire will represent the returning
strength of the sun and a time of growth and warmth to look forward to. It is a tradition too to
decorate the home with evergreens and candles.
In Roman times they celebrated the day as the feast of Saturnalia. They exchanged presents and
the world happily went mad. Slaves were allowed to be the master and the master had a go at
being a servant. It was all good natured.
When Christianity arrived, it was never going to give up on this happy day. While they celebrated
the birth of Jesus, they also retained these country customs.
So we have Boxing Day for the exchange of presents, we decorate the house with evergreens and
bring a tree into the house. The pantomime is a fairy tale story where the actors reverse roles, the
principal boy is played by a girl and the female villains played by men as a comedy role. So we all
have fun.
The celebrations were moved a bit beyond the shortest day to allow more emphasis on the central
story of the birth of the infant Jesus. Like the returning sun he is the symbol of new life and new
beginnings. The anxious time of the journey is overturned into a heavenly celebration of generosity,
hope and love.
I amTony McNeile, a Unitarian.